Surgery Day

“And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13

Someone posted this on my mom’s facebook wall. I find it very fitting for today. I am humbled by everyone’s love, positive thoughts, prayers, and words of encouragement for Mom and for us as a family. Before I get to a recap of today, I want to thank everyone-it brings me tears of joy (seriously yes I cried J) to know how many of you care and have been praying/sending positive thoughts our way.  

Today was/is surgery day. I hate hospitals. I realize that a lot of people hate hospitals. They just smell so blah. Hospitals should pipe in some of that scented air they have in Vegas Casinos-not the whole place just the doorways that you walk in-how comforting would that be.

Before surgery we were all crammed into a small “prep-op room.” Per usual we were having a good time laughing. Not all of the nurses enjoyed our sense of humor. Here are some photos of my ridiculous nature on the wheely stool that was in her room.

I had a good time “creeping” on people in the hallway.

I also had a good time entertaining with this one. I call it my “nooo don’t take me back there!” others referred to that photos as the “shhh you can’t see me hiding in the corner.” Regardless we had a fun time waiting to go back. Well as fun as 5 adults can have crammed in a small room waiting for your mom/husband/daughter to have a breast amputation.

Before Mom’s surgery she had to go through Nuclear procedure to see if the cancer had spread to her nodes. I’m not really sure what any of that meant but it would affect what needs to happen after surgery (i.e. chemo). Well there were several “Hulk” jokes begin made, and then I kinda hoped her breast would begin to glow a blue color so we knew it was working. We were all sadly disappointed.

I kept my queasy under control until it was time to put in the IV. I stepped out briefly for this.

We said our tearful good byes (positive but still tearful) to her, and well her breasts. In that moment it hit us that it was really happening. There is a certain feeling of denial until she was getting up to walk into surgery.

Surgery took about two and a half hours. The waiting room had a like “ticker” of updates so you could track what stage of surgery she was in-and there were symbols and a little key. It was pretty neat. At one point all four us were working on the crossword puzzle. That’s dad “thinking” face J

We didn’t finish it-or we couldn’t I can’t remember. We got stuck on one of the last clues, but by that time Mom was ready to roll out.

Mom is currently on the 6^th floor-can’t remember the room number. When I first saw mom she looked at me (still very drugged) and said “Hey, baby” I know that she was in the best care, but it was the most comforting part of my day. I’m sure she won’t remember it, but that’s okay.

She looks great. A little flatter, but great. We won’t know anything official for about a week. Mom should be heading home tomorrow. Doesn’t that boggle your mind? I will leave you all with the face that I greeted Mom with once she was settled in her room. It may be a little crazy, but the look is pure me J  

cancer-is that an awkward title

I’m not really sure how to start this point. It’s awkward just putting it out there-like I have said it aloud several times, but typing it out makes me feel like my clothes don’t fit right.

Just in case you haven’t heard, my mother (calling her “mother” makes her sound a lot older than she really is J) found out that she has breast cancer again. Was that awkward for you? Because it was for me…but I’m awkward and ridiculous.

When I was in seventh grade mom was diagnosed, had her first chemo on my birthday, and then shaved her head at my birthday party. I guess at that point it wasn’t my birthday party anymore. I remember no one would shave her head except for Jenny. Then that’s about all I remember until I went to a radiation treatment with her.

Is it weird that I don’t remember? That year of my life is blocked from my memory. I’m okay with that-I know I lashed out at people unnecessarily, but hey I was in seventh grade and my mom had cancer. So here we are 15 years later, I’m older, my sister is older so hopefully I won’t block this year from my memory.

I also made the decision to be more aware this time, and not shut down-I think I’m too old for that. J 

So Mom is getting a double mastectomy. I mean at this point what is the other option? I’m having a hard time wrapping my brain around the concept that when she looks down there will be no boobs to see, not having to put on a bra every day, and just the fact that something that has been puberty will no longer be present.

Mom wrote a list of “perks” I have my own “perks” and questions to add that are way more ridiculous, but they are thoughts I have had:

·        Will she experience phantom boob? Or phantom nipples when it is cold? Seriously though I feel like someone should do a study. The government will fund anything.

·        No more underboob sweat-ladies you know what I’m talking about. It’s so gross and awkward.

·        Get different size prosthetics. Brings accessorizing to a whole new level.

One thing that is truly amazing about my mom is how positive she is-and I mean yes I know it’s better than drowning in sorrow. But if my options are laugh or cry I choose laugh. I’m not a pretty crier. One thing Dad, Mom, Kim, and I do well is laugh. We make sick jokes that make people look at us weird, but we laugh. 

It still sucks. My mom still has cancer. 

is that awkward.? sorry i don't know where to take this entry now.... 

Updates

An update on my 2013 goals: 

~read 50 books: well I am currently reading about 5, and haven't finished any...
Currently I am reading: 

• "Gone Girl"
• "Dead Until Dark"
• "Tough Shit"
• and two others that I can't remember the titles of lol

~start shlumping again: progress! Yesterday I restarted couch to 5 day, and managed almost 2 miles in 30 minutes. I guess I wasn't as out of shape as I thought. :) My friend Lizer and I are keeping each other in check with the gym-she even offers to chase me in her car while I shlump..she doesn't understand running for no reason, and truthfully I don't get it either. 

~take a photography class: I have signed up for Beginner Digital Photography that starts 1/22. I am very excited about it. 

~start a blog about said photography adventures: there hasn't really been anything to say about it all yet. 

~look for a master's program, and possibly start applying: no progress here, this may be a summer item. 

Ponderings

Inevitably as we inch closer to 2013 everyone starts coming up with resolutions. I don't like the word resolution because I feel like it just dooms me for failure. So I'm going to call them goals-besides there is a certain amount of ego boost when one reaches a goal.

Goals for 2012 (6 days left)/2013

• read 50 books. I know that I teach English, but that does not leave me a lot of time to read. I will track my reading on goodreads.com. I think I already have an account...
• start "running" again. well what I like to call shlumping. "Races" for 2013: Race for a Cure, Color Run, Drumstick Dash. None of these are actually races...but in my mind they are. 
• Take a photography class-well probably two, and actually go out and use those skills. I'm most excited about this one. 
• Start a blog about said photography adventures. 
• Look for a Master's program. I am very picky about this for some reason. I know there is no logical reason for being picky, but I can't help myself. 
• Maybe apply for a Master's program. 

My Favorite Holiday!

So Thanksgiving and various other holiday/family get-togethers are right around the corner. I love this season. I love giving, and I love hostessing/help hostess things. I love hostessing things year-round. I know several people who constantly feel like this: 

And in previous years I guess I have felt that way during family events that involved a lot of prep. I know some people ask others to bring things, and for me I have the most fun actually making the food and setting things up. I have learned some "tricks" that I am going to share, because sometimes everyone needs tips. Most of these are stolen from my favorite cooking blog. 

1. Be Santa
Meaning, make lists-yes multiple lists for different things. I start with the menu because that was/is what come easiest to me, I also find the most joy in creating this list. I made lists last year for Thanksgiving, and it saved me a lot of stress, and sometimes money.  I prefer to hand write my lists because I like hand writing, and I feel like I remember things more when I write them. Here are the lists I made with a brief description if needed: 

• Menu-I attach the recipes that I need to the menu to keep everything in one place. 
• Grocery List-I go through each recipe and the cabinets to make my list. I find that when I go recipe by recipe those little (or sometimes major :/) things are not missed. 
• Shopping List-these are nonfood related items that need to be purchased for the event. Again I check around my house before purchasing. 
• Calendar week of-Last year I made several things for Thanksgiving before Thursday. It saved me time not only on Thanksgiving but stress. I include things like what to make, or what to start to assemble/chop, when to thaw things, and what to clean. 
• Play Book for the Day of-plan times out with what time you want to eat. Then backwards plan. Seriously this was the best things I did last year. I posted the time schedule for foods/set up on the fridge so everyone knew :) I also enforce that time table, much to some people's irritation. 

2. Be In Control

So I go ahead and assume that all families are like mine-everyone crowds in the kitchen. Last year I "took control" of Thanksgiving. And if you have cooked that meal every thing finishes at the same time, and it can be hectic. I started to get frazzled-everyone was giving input. This is my family, and I love them. I then promptly kicked them out. I made a rule, no more than three in the kitchen until it's time to eat and then I enforced it. This may be the teacher in me or the control freak in me, but it worked. I am sure I pissed some of my relatives off, but oh well. I know that there are some loved ones who don't listen, and well I just figured out away to get them the hell out of my space. 

3. Something will go wrong...deal with it
Last year we forgot to turn the heat down on the turkey so it cooked in two hours less than I had scheduled. Oh well it was cooked, and things can be reheated. Learn for next year, and move on. Nothing was ruined, and everything was still delicious. I also claim that it isn't a family get together until the f bomb is dropped out of frustration. Laugh at the f'up and move on. 

4. Enjoy the day
Not everything will go as planned, but as long as family or friends are around everything is fine. Don't spend the whole day in the kitchen. Have a glass (or three) of wine and enjoy making the memories. Let your day be like this: 

Gobble Gobble 

Projects

By now all 8 of my readers are on pinterest. I am like most people in that I pin things thinking "I can totally do that" but then never get to it. Well this year I have actually attempted several but ran into several hiccups along the way that made the project a no go.  Most of these were gardening ideas that would have worked if I had a way to constantly water them. My dad and I spent several hours at Lowes trying to make it work. 

I really enjoy spending time on projects with my dad trying to trouble shoot problems to make something work. Once he said that he could drill through my townhouses brick wall to make a power supply I had to say no. I am a renter after all. :)

So I have decided to make a resolution of sorts when it come to pinning.  I am going to try one craft project a month. I cannot commit to one a week-that would involve  more money than I am willing to spend.  I have no real crafting supplies, and I don't want to buy a lot of things for a one time craft. 

I have made recipe off of my Pinterest boards before.  I am making this one right now-literally right now it is in the oven: http://www.sixsistersstuff.com/2011/10/cheesy-enchilada-casserole.html It smells delish. I am sure it will be. I have made enough things to know when something sounds like it will work out, or will taste like crap.  

Here is my craft goal for this month: http://www.makeitandfakeit.com/2012/04/diy-wrap-bracelet.html


I think it looks pretty idiot proof. I will post pics if I remember to post ;) 


PS: this past week I have entered what I am calling the "twilight of my 20's". (I stole it from a friend). One of my goals is to blog more than once every nine months. *Fingers crossed* that it works. 

I leave my readers with an adorable pic of my baby-seriously look at those puppy eyes 

My Cooking Essentials

Cooking Entry

I think there are essentials for anyone’s kitchen-well anyone who likes to cook. If you would rather eat out or have it delivered you will probably find this blog boring. By essentials I mean the tools. I don’t really have any brand recommendations, but I do believe that this is one room where I purchase the best because well I don’t want to replace it any time soon. I have found that this usually translates to buying name brand items and doing research. These are things that I currently own or one day hope to own.

So let’s begin…

• An awesome knife set. I think if I were to ask my dad what essential kitchen items one needed this would be in his top two. My parents have had the same knife set for 30 years.
• A cast iron skillet. I recently got one for Christmas from my cousin Ryan. And well I’m in love. Seriously what can’t this pan do? This is a relatively inexpensive purchase, and if cared for properly it will last FOREVER! If you have never owned one you need to research how to care for it.
• Various measuring utensils. I have two sets of measuring cups, and a four cup liquid measuring cup please measuring spoons. These are all pretty much the same, but I like have variety.
• Nonstick pots and pans. These just make life a lot easier. But they are a high care item. Don’t ever use metal inside of them-I did this with my dad’s pan a long time ago, and well let’s just say I still remember him yelling at me… also don’t use brillo any sort of abrasive scrubber on them. I started having kitchen rules meetings with my roommates in college and I felt myself using the same phrases my dad used that evening he caught me using a metal spoon on his pan.
• Various size cutting boards. I have a small, medium, and large. All of them are plastic. I haven’t decided if wood is better or not. I am currently happy with my plastic ones.
• Cookie sheets/muffin tins/cake pans/etc. I use these all of the time. Not always for sweets.
• Parchment paper/silicone mats. I recently purchased the silicone mats and I will not use parchment paper unless I am making bacon in the oven. They are a little pricey, but well worth it. They can be used at higher temperature baking and they are reusable.
• Cooking Utensils. I have so many spoons, spatulas, tongs in metal, plastic, rubber and wood. I learned what to use and when just by trial and error. My parents have been using the same wooden spoon for eons. Seriously eons.
• Food Processor. I have a little one-it is green. I prefer the smaller one because it is easier to store, and I don’t ever need to chop up that much stuff at one time.
• Standing Mixer. I got one from my mom three years ago for Christmas. She is green, and I named her Georgia. This year I also purchased the ice cream attachment. And yes, it is a KitchenAid, and as far as I am concerned there is no other standing mixer worth buying.

I think this sums up what I use most often in my kitchen, and things that I want most for my kitchen. I could probably write pages on just the tools for kitchen use, but I am a total kitchen geek.